It’s one of the trickiest aspects of navigating a new relationship: could your latest love interest be a serial dater? Signs of a serial dater can be clear to outsiders on occasion, but often they are subtle and don’t reveal themselves until the person you are dating is already pulling away.
From all-too-common romantic comedy troupes to the stories fellow women in the real world share, it would seem that serial daters tend to have a few red flags in common.
Spotting a serial dater is key to avoid a painful and abrupt breakup. If the man or woman you’re dating is more than likely getting ready to move on to the next conquest, these signs can help you prepare for the truth about his or her serial dating status.
They’re all about that chase
We’ve all seen it happen, or fallen victim to it ourselves – boy and girl meet, boy and girl fall in love, boy and girl disappear off the face of the Earth for anywhere from 1-3 months before one of the two emerges, heartbroken, because the other has stopped calling and is, in fact, currently pursuing a newer model. When the honeymoon phase is over, it’s really over.
That, my friends, is called a serial chaser, and when you see it happening to your friends or suspect that it is happening to you, RUN, don’t walk, to the nearest exit.
Getting swept off your feet is one thing, but failing to see the signs of a serial dater who is only in it for the chase can lead to a broken heart a few months – or weeks! –down the line.
They’re noncommittal
Whether you’re discussing where to get brunch this weekend or what your summertime travel plans might be, someone who purposely avoids pinning down exact dates and times is someone to watch out for. Sure, he or she might just be uber laidback and waiting to see how things play out, but someone who can’t tell you what they will be doing on Sunday probably isn’t too keen on making plans to meet your family this holiday season.
A serial dater is more likely to keep options open – don’t settle for being just one of them.
They’re superficial
Is the person you’re dating overly interested in your appearance? Does he or she value personal comfort over the needs of others? Are material possessions and money/status the standard by which your love interest measures others?
A superficial person who keeps others at an arm’s reach, is overly focused on his or her job, and who judges people is probably not that interested in getting to know the real you. Save your softer side for someone who deserves it, and let Mr. Right Now get back to the business of being a serial dater.
Trust your instincts
It’s tempting to get swept away in the oversized emotions and games of a serial dater, but once the spell is broken, you’ll wonder why you didn’t spot the telltale signs sooner. Trust us – you might enjoy the thrill of the chase, but the sting of rejection leaves little to be desired. If it seems too good to be true – it probably is.