Baby Come Back: What to do When They Leave

Breaking up. It’s one of the most difficult things to do, especially when you’re on the receiving end of one of the classic “it’s not you, it’s me” lines. Before you know it you’re six shots deep with your phone in hand ready to press their contact name for the fourth time that night. We are here to tell you to step away from the cellular device and go drink some water while you turn off “Baby Come Back” and figure out what to do when they leave.

While there’s nothing wrong with wanting your ex back, there is something wrong with constantly groveling to them and confessing you’re unwavering love when you’re in the wake of a break up. Long story short, it only makes you look desperate and weak and more often than not, it reassures them that they made the right decision in ending things with you.

Instead of spending so much time wondering why they left and trying to get them back, focus on getting your priorities back in line first. Cleanse yourself of the relationship and when you’re ready, spend some time figuring out why things didn’t work out, after all, you’re broken up for a reason. Instead of wasting time convincing yourself that what your ex is saying isn’t possibly the real reason things ended, try to genuinely listen to what they have to say and accept that part of the reason why the relationship is over could be your fault.

Now, once you’ve taken responsibility for your part, it’s time to figure out whether or not you were truly happy with them to begin with. You may come to find that although you thought that this person you were so in love with had absolutely no flaws is actually far from perfect. Now that you know what was making you unhappy, should you try things with them again you’ll be able to openly communicate about what changes need to be made to keep the relationship working.

That being said, we don’t want you to go and making a PowerPoint Presentation donning the title of “Reasons Why You Should Come Back to Me.” While it may be aching on the inside for you to not spend every waking moment with this person, you simply can’t spend your days trying to convince them to get back together with you. If it does work it could cause resentment later on and could also make them feel like you’re being manipulative. On the other hand, if it doesn’t work, you’ll be left feeling even sadder and now on top of the sadness you’ll probably be feeling pretty pathetic and extraordinarily rejected.

Instead of begging for their love and attention, take some time to work on yourself. The end of a relationship is the end of something that was consuming a lot of your time. Don’t spend all of that now vacant space in your days wondering if they’ll ever come back to you but instead find out what makes you feel alive and figure out what makes you happy alone. In the end you may realize that they did you a favor in ending the relationship and end up recognizing that you want more than what they could’ve ever offered you.